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Monday, December 10, 2012

Kids Say...

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Tales from the Teacher's Lounge

Bill Cosby would have so much to work with had he been working at my school.

Kids truly do say the darndest things...

"Can I go to the bathroom?  My stomach reeeally hurts."
Next time, just ask to go to the bathroom.  I don't need the deets.

"Why don't you have babies?"
Me: "I'm only 27 so I got to enjoy some of my 20s being just married first."
"You're getting old.  You better have them soon."
I almost want to ask if my parents paid them to say this.
But really, when did kids start thinking 27 was old?!
Or am I just old and that's why I think 27 is young now?

"That skirt makes your butt look bigger than normal."
Ouch.

"Miss, what's wrong with your face?  You don't look so good."
My response: Thanks, you look nice, too!

"If I asked you to go to prom with me, what would you say?"

"Miss, you're skinnier today."
I actually thanked the kid for that one.

"Are you pregnant or are you just getting fat?"
Just fat, thanks for asking.

The most recent:
(after I already received an apology letter from the girl)
"Miss, I am so sorry that I lied to you that day that we were in running club and I told you about my sister."
Me: When did you lie to me?
"You remember.  I told you about my sister not coming to school."
Me: (in my head: nope.) Oh, okay.
"I'm really sorry.  I didn't know you were a Christian woman.  I know that since you are a Christian woman, you would never tell a lie.  I truly didn't mean to hurt you heart like that."
Me: You're forgiven.  (Please, walk away)
"Really, miss, I'm sorry.  I didn't mean to make your heart cry."
Me: You're forgiven.  It's okay, really.
"Okay, do you forgive me, miss?"
Me: Yes (Yesssssss!!!!!!! a;dljfalskdfalsdhflakds)

Remind me why I chose middle school?
stillbeingmolly

7 comments:

  1. oh MAN i can't believe even students harass you about having babies! I thought that was limited to parents and in-laws... :)

    Sea and Swank

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  2. ha ha ha.. those are too funny. Kids really can be so mean without meaning it..
    xx
    www.atipsytart.blogspot.com

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  3. ohmygosh these are so great! those kids....

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  4. hahahaha i am dying. i used to have a whole document FULL of hilarious things my students said when i was a teacher.

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  5. aww!!!! kids seriously say the craziest things!! love this post..

    krista

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  6. hahaha oh my gosh!! They really do say the craziest things! Can't believe they said that about you having babies.

    xo,
    Angela

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  7. Found you from Kaitlyn's blog (you commented on her Passionfruit question!)
    Your blog is so fun...and man, are these kiddos funny! I got my degree in ECE and am currently working as an executive assistant while I look for a teaching job.
    can't wait to read more--let me know if you want to swap buttons!

    ReplyDelete

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