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Wednesday, January 6, 2016

How to Keep Your Pregnancy a Secret


This is probably the hardest thing in the world especially your first go 'round.

That first time you have no clue what's about to hit you.  The nausea, the cramping, the up all night, the headaches, they hit and you just go for survival of the fittest.  Really...it's your only option.

But there, are a few things you can do to try to mask those early signs of pregnancy.

1. Live in leggings
Seriously...why wouldn't you wear the pants that really aren't pants all the time anyway?  I mean, elastic waistband, stretchy fabric, and no zipper when it's time to potty?  You're not truly living until you're living in leggings.

2. Drink through a straw
Just do this 24/7 and no one will know that the one thing you crave is Sprite out of a can through a straw when your stomach can't find a way to stop rolling.

3. Eat citrus
I don't know if this works for everyone, but every time I started to feel queasy with this pregnancy, I popped out a clementine and my symptoms started to go away as I ate.

4. Nurse your wine glass
I really had people guessing on Christmas Eve when I happily accepted a glass of red wine (even my husband gave me a sideways glance).  I carried that sucker with me everywhere - even to the bathroom each time I had to go where conveniently I had a sink to slowly drain the yumminess making it look as though I'd been drinking.

5. Lower back problems
First trimester = extreme fatigue meaning I wanted to sit on my butt all the time so I started telling people my back was bothering me.  It wasn't a total untruth - it was sore, but not unbearable or for the reasons I gave people.  I also got myself out of a staff dodgeball tournament this way.

6. Do your hair and makeup
Just do it.  You won't want to, but if you don't people will notice.

7.  Avoid the sushi joint
It will just upset you anyway.  But if people notice you aren't eating any raw rolls, they will know why.

8.  Peppermint stash
Keep peppermints on hand for those moments when nausea hits and you ned to cover it up.

9. Depends
Just kidding - but you will pee a lot.  I guess you'll just have to blame your upped water intake.

10.  Enjoy every single second of it.
Don't let ANYONE take this moment from you.  If they ask questions, give whatever answer you want - don't feel obligated to share until you're ready.  There is something special about just you and your significant other knowing about the baby on board.  And then another special moment when you tell your parents.  It's a secret worth enjoying.

Babies are the best!

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