Confession time:
If you've been around here for any amount of time or if you follow my Facebook page you know that my son is pretty much my favorite part of life. I mean, life was good, but now it's in HD - you know what I mean?
Being momma is my favorite job.
So, when my husband and I started talking about Baby #2 I was really excited because I dream of a big family sitting around the dining room table, really loud and boisterous, and just warm. Like Brothers&Sisters type of family.
I wasn't expecting to feel so conflicted when I actually got pregnant. Don't get me wrong! I wanted this baby, I prayed for this baby, way before we even started talking about having this baby. And I'm elated to be it's momma. But, it wasn't long after I knew I was pregnant that I started having lots of thoughts and questions like...
Is CT ready to share me?
Am I ready to share CT?!
Can I possibly love another human being as much as I love him?
The other day I was at the doctor for an ultrasound and I got to see the baby and hear it's heartbeat and instantly I just knew:
I love this baby. There is absolutely no question whether or not CT can share me or if I can share him. This baby is already part of our family and I can't wait to watch CT be a big brother and I can't wait to watch him love his sibling and to watch him be loved by his sibling.
I have shared these sentiments with others and it sounds like its pretty common for mothers to feel this way, to worry. We're mothers after all. It's what we do, right?
I think this pregnancy has me more on edge and anxious than my first! Part of that is because of CT's unexpected early arrival and part of that is because I have a toddler climbing all over me 80% of the day and part of it is just change. And you know how I feel about change...
chenlili20160317
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