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Tuesday, January 28, 2020


Have you taken the enneagram test everyone is talking about?

I took it a few years ago after hearing Rachel Hollis rave about it in so many of her podcasts and at her live event for my company.  And I must say I prefer it to the other personality type tests I've taken in the past.

Essentially this test assigns you numbers that go along with your personality and I know that my core values haven't changed in the past 2 years, but as a person, I've come a long way so I wanted to see if my results had changed.

Again, I was a 2 with a wing 3 which is what I've always been and it as accurate as can be if you know me...

I am totally the helper and as much as I hate to admit it feeling unwanted or disliked is my absolute worst nightmare which is why the events of the past 2 years have been sooooo hard on me.  I am super sensitve and nurturing.  As far as my "wing" - this just means it's my next highest number and it's so high that it could easily be used to describe me as well - yup, that's me, too!

I a an achiever.  I want to win and goal crush and do all the things.  And I'm always in my friends' corner cheering for them as well.

A cool thing happened this time though.  I ended up with a second "wing."  This was equally weighted with 3 and THIS is what has changed about me in teh last 2 years.  This is something I am most proud of.  I have always felt confident about my character; being a good person.  But, with all that I've experienced I've made a point to stop living life by society's terms and expectations and to stop doing the "right thing" just because it's the right thing.  I've started to have my own opinion, my own voice, my own beliefs and if they don't align with everyone else's so be it.  I've realized it doesn't make me a bad person to be my own person.  So I'm proud of this wing...

It's true.  I'm sensitive, authentic, creative, and empathetic almost to a fault.  I have also become extremely self aware of my personal needs and desires.  I am inspired to be creative.  I hate it when people ignore me now - I use to sit back and let it happen.  I've been called dramatic a handful of times and maybe I am, but mostly I think people just aren't use to hearing my new voice.  

Get use to it, y'all.  Here I am.

Here's some more info on the test if you decide to take it.

Thursday, January 23, 2020


It took me a while - a long while - to figure out what I wanted my word for 2020 to be.  2019 truly was a year of healing for me.  Spiritual, mental, emotional.  I wanted it to be my comeback year, but it was more or less a year of survival.  I'd like to think I did a little more than survive, but as I look back with that 20/20 hindsight we all know and love I realize it was more about just getting through.  And I'm not discounting it.  It wasn't easy, but I did it.

I'm proud of 2019 because it forced me to put my own oxygen mask on.  For so long I had been handling everything for everyone, but me.  And I literally had no choice to do me first or I was going to lose it.  Allllll of it.  And it wasn't going to be pretty.  So I did what I had to do.

I started therapy.  I took weekly baths.  I exercised daily.  I started working with a life coach.  I got a business mentor.  I read a lot of books.  I started a daily gratitude journal.  I prayed a lot and cried just as much.  I listened to podcasts.  I screamed.  I ran.  I wept.  I did what felt right.  What felt necessary.

And here I am today still standing.  Not an entirely new person, but a lot changed. 

I'm not nearly as naive as I once was.  Honestly, I don't love this about myself.  I sort of miss my natural ability to trust, but I know it is not wise.  I notice things and see red flags and I've stopped accepting things I don't want in my life into my life.  I wrote down non-negotiables for my future man and they are just that, non-negotiable.  I don't allow people to speak down to me without speaking up for myself.  I've stopped being the yes girl and started saying no more. 

I'm definitely stronger, more independent, and courageous. 

2020 is going to be my year to not just get back on track with my goals, but to break through them.  I'm not just going to fly or rise in my case.  I am going to SOAR.

More on my goals later, for now, my word is soar.

Thursday, January 16, 2020

10 Reasons NOT to have a Gym Membership

I use to love the gym.  Like, self-proclaimed gym rat.  It felt like the communal watering hole for awesome people and I wanted to drink the kool-aid.  I mean, I guess I really liked to be able to answer, "I'm heading to the gym," when people asked me what I was doing after work.  Also, the group fitness aerobics class on Saturday mornings was my straight up JAM.

Until I had kids...

So, no gym membership for this chick going on 7 years now.  Let me give you 10 good reasons why:

1.  Too damn expensive.
I feel like this is everyone's excuse these days for not prioritizing their health/fitness when it comes to exercise and nutrition, but let's be real, y'all.  For the purpose of this blog post I did a little local research for the gyms in my area and this is what I found. 

One CrossFit gym offered memberships ranging from $55-$120/month depending on what you were looking for.  $120 got you 24 hours access.  The newest gym to come into our town starts at something like $65/month for a membership and when I looked at their class schedule the majority of them are virtual.  So you literally travel to the gym to take a virtual class.  The new Planet Fitness advertises for $10.99/month, BUT to upgrade and have access to any Planet Fitness Worldwide (you must commit to 12 months for this package) it is $22.99/month.  Not awful, but still almost $300/year.  And lastly, the local YMCA is $60 to start up and then $42.05/month for one adult.

This doesn't even include the local yoga studio which is a whopping $534/6 months of yoga!

I just can't with that, y'all.  I mean, I like to splurge on myself a few times a month and if I was spending $40+ on a gym membership I would feel really guilty doing something extra.

2.  Travel time.
I get it, gyms are literally popping up everywhere.  I mean I'm pretty sure I have 5 options within less than 5 miles of my house right now, BUT those 5 miles of travel will more than likely keep me from actually using the membership.  Convenience is life for me.  I'm on a super limited time budget and those 5 miles will add at least 10-20 minutes to my workout time (both ways).

3.  My kids.
Some of the gyms above provide childcare which is amazing.  Some are open 24/7 when I could have someone else watch my kids so I could go.  Some even offer kids' fitness classes for an additional charge.  All of that is amazing!  However, I'm a big sufferer of mom guilt and I do not like having my children in school, daycare, and after school care all day just to put them in the gym play area for an hour each evening so I can work out.  I actually want to spend time with my kids.

4.  It's gross.
When I was in my 20s I didn't care, but now every time I use a community gym I think of all the other sweat, hair, and body parts that have touched the equipment.  Not to mention, my roommate in college got ring worm from using the mats even after sanitizing the equipment each time.  Ew.

5.  Crowds
Something you may not know about me; I hate crowds.  I avoid the mall like the plague.  If it's not an outdoor strip or outlet mall, you won't see me there.  I am not a clubber because I don't like bumping into all the people.  In fact the only time you'll find me (willingly) in a crowd and smiling is at Disney World.  I'll happily sit my butt in a crowd at that place.

6.  Wait Time.
I hate waiting for people to get off equipment so that I can get my workout in.  Maybe this goes along with my time problem with travel.  I'm on a limited time budget, people!  Instagram your bicep after you're done using the weight bench!  And stop trying to read your text book and listen to your headphones while walking on a treadmill for 60 minutes. 

7.  Accountability.
Or lack thereof.  No one knows if I go to the gym or not.  So, if I don't feel like paying for it, traveling to it, putting my kids in childcare, or dealing with people, no one knows if I skip it.  Which means no one calls me out for it. 

8.  Equipment.
This one might confuse you, but the equipment in a gym can be so overwhelming.  I mean, what do I do with some of those machines?!  Not to mention, what do I do with the machines consistently over time so that I get the results I'm looking for?  In other words, I want someone telling me what to do.  And based on the previous cost rundown, I can't afford that.

9.  Food.
Ummmm....someone told me Planet Fitness offers pizza on Fridays and bagels throughout the month?  Sort of defeats the purpose of paying and going if you ask me.  I mean, I like free food and all, but maybe a shake or something?

10. Schedules.
I don't like doing things on someone else's time.  I realize that sounds so spoiled rotten, but it's true.  I don't want to show up to the gym at 7:00 AM on Saturday morning for my HIIT Bootcamp class.  I want to do it when I feel like doing it on Saturday.  I don't want to race from a parent/teacher conference to the gym to join the back of the pilates class 5 minutes late.  Honestly, I hate appointments.  Knowing I have to be somewhere at a specific time outside my normal work schedule gives me anxiety.  So, yeah, I like to do it when I want.

Like I said, I looooooved the gym for years.  I mean I could spend hours there and feel pretty damn good about myself, but that all changed when my time budget started adulting on me. 

Are you a gym rat?

Tuesday, January 14, 2020

First DIY of 2020: My Bathroom

I've got a few projects on my list for 2020 and I decided to start in my bathroom; the one in my master bedroom.  When I first moved into my new home last February the bathrooms were the only rooms I did absolutely nothing to in an effort to make them my own.  My bedroom and personal bathroom are the only two rooms that really took the back burner for the past year because my intent was to make the kids happy and comfortable with our new living arrangements. 

I decided to give myself a budget of $200 and really focus on updating the builder's grade bathroom by doing it myself and spending as little as possible.  I've only just started the project, but I'm already blown away with the results I'm seeing! 

Once I decided to go all in with the project I got a little excited and went ahead and took the cabinet doors out before taking an actual "before" photo, but you get the idea...


I was determined not to paint, but in the end I opted to buy a cheap pre-mixed gallon at Walmart and suck it up because let's be real here; the most cost-effective way to update a space is with paint!  And the walls were the same builder's beige they had been since the house was built. 

I'll have to share my half-bath DIY that cost me about $10 to complete last year so you can see what I did with a light fixture like the one I have here. I intended to do something similar to this one, but realized when pricing new globes for it that it would cost me about $50 to do.  Instead, I hit up my local Habitat for Humanity and found an adorable piece that was in need of some spray paint (which I had left over from that half-bath project) and good bulbs.  I snagged it for $12 and got to work. 

Last time I did this I took the time to sand before spraying and it didn't seem to make much difference so this time I opted not to sand first - mostly because I was too anxious to get started.  It came out just as well as when I did.

I love the industrial look and a good coat of matte black paint does just the trick.  Now, let's just hope the fixture works when I wire it into the wall!

I did take the time to sand my cabinets and drawers because I felt like the finish on them needed to come off so that the paint could really soak in.  That was time well spent.  I also made sure to purchase specific cabinet paint for this job which runs a little higher than regular interior paint.  I got a quart of a dark grey color and have more than enough left to do another set of cabinets in the future.  I cannot believe the difference this has made in the room already!  I can't wait to finish the project and show you the true before/after.

Do you have any DIY projects on your vision board for 2020?  I'd love to hear about them!

Friday, January 10, 2020

Hello again...

Forgive me.  Last year I announced that I would reinstate the blog and then I realized that the year needed to be reserved for more important matters like grieving, healing, and laying new foundation.

Honestly, the last thing I could think about was "one more thing."

Isn't that how most of us feel?  Like "one more thing" might break us?  We can't wake up earlier in the morning than we already do because it's already too early.  We can't exercise for 30 minutes a day because we are already short on time.  And so many other things we cannot do because it is simply on. more. thing.

Today I sat down and put the finishing touches on my vision board for 2020.  Yes, I know, 2020 started 10 days ago, but for me, it really felt like it started on Tuesday.  Tuesday was my 35th birthday.  My 35th birthday in a new decade after a year of rediscovering myself and healing (although I'd say there's more healing to come) - it felt pretty significant so my new year has officially started now. 

It took me a while to come up with a word of the year because I really wanted to set the tone; make it count, ya know?  I don't just want to rise, I don't want to just survive, I want to SOAR.

I've got lots of things on here that scare the poop out of me to be honest with you, but I decided to go ahead and put them on there anyway because it's not necessarily about what happens at the end of the year from me...it's who I become along the way.  The process means more than the product.

So this year I want to do more
  • home DIY projects (starting with my bedroom/bathroom)
  • cooking
  • reading
  • soaking in baths
  • running
  • listening to podcasts
  • creating systems for my life and my business
  • growing
  • healing
And a little (or lot) less
  • pushing snooze
  • listening to other people's stories about my life
  • worrying 
  • saying yes to things I don't want to do
What's your word for 2020?   Any big goals?